August 27th, 2001 Man am I a lucky fella. But you don't have to just take my word for it. Come with me on a tour of what came into my inbox in one single day. The day that I'm calling... My luckiest birthday ever! By Gary The first email I got just asked my opinions on a few things, and then they gave me $1000!!! Just like that! And I told them I hated everything they wanted me to comment on. They were nice! What luck! Then, out of nowhere, this other company just gives me 2 FREE airline tickets AND an entire HOTEL, which I think is in Italy. So, I'm all excited about that, and then I go to this store, and all the products are FREE!!! I even got stuff shipped to me for free - no shipping charge. Can you believe my luck? So on the way home I checked my mailbox again, and lo and behold, I have more than 2 weeks to go claim the $100 Gift Certificate I got, just for being me. Mr. Lucky. I think I'll see if I can cash it in and use the money when I go to VEGAS!!! There are vacant rooms waiting for me, and the whole time I'm there I can absolutely put Korea out of my mind, because these nice folks offered to take care of all my marketing over there. Can you believe it? It really reaffirmed my faith in people. So then I'm talking to this woman, and she says "Hey, do you want a bachelor's or master's degree?" I said "I think I've already got a bachelor's, but a master's would be nice." So, she hooks me up with this website, and now I have one. Whoo! That's gonna look good on the old resume. Of course, nothing's going to look as good as me cruising up in my new 2001 Dodge Viper!!!! That goes without saying. Anyway, I just got done eating some salad I made with my new Free Multipurpose Salad Grater, and the phone rings. It's Miss Cleo!!! I can't even believe it. The super star of the late night psychics. I used to hate Miss Cleo and was a total non-believer - until I realized what a great service she performs by telling a lot of sad people to dump the jerks they're dating. I can't believe she actually found ME! She told me to break up, which inspired me to do just that. I went to bar, picked up a girl, and left her immediately. She was very sad that the 10 minutes we had spent in conversation had been for nothing. The weird thing is I had gone to check out www.mindandspirit.com about a week ago, just for a laugh, but I never told the site who I was. And STILL Miss Cleo finds me!!! She totally must've known I had visited her based on her psychic abilities. Now I fully believe in her talents. It was a good thing she was able to reach me. I could use some psychic insight. She told me that I'm living a very dangerous life, and that I should look into life insurance so my children will be taken care of. She's SO GOOD! I didn't even know I had children, but SHE did! Wow. Anyway, the scare's over. Because of Miss Cleo, I started keeping my eyes open for all the things that might kill me, and it turns out I was just setting myself up for a car accident with multiple traumas to the head. Thankfully, because I'd been warned by Miss Cleo and these other people I don't know, I was able to AVOID BRAIN damage!!! Others weren't so lucky. And speaking of lucky, some nice old man just gave me $20. No reason at all... I am a lucky fella. This is my best birthday ever!!! All content © 1999-2007 misinformer.com.   As a matter of fact, I DO want to see hot celebrity nudes, thank you!